11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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