ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
birth control should be required to get into college
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
