Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
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It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
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Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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