Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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