What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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