At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
When are your genitals available?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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