I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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