The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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