Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
