dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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