My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize