both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
