I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
