I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
