It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
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