Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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