She's JV to your varsity
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You left your underwear on the fireplace
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
