Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
