I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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