this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
