Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Randomize
