i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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