Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
