; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
