Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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