Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Congratulations! We have a period
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