Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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