we're blogging at a bar
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
