he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize