i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
