this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
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I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
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i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.