then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
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