The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
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