the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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