My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
