I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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