Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
