I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
