I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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