Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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