It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
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You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
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I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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