Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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