I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize
