ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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