he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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