Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
