I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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