Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
