I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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