The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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