gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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