Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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