so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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